So I am sitting here thinking to myself "Why did God give me such Monstrous Children" I try to think back to my childhood and wonder if I ever got into so much trouble as my kids do. Did I ever flush Bread down the toilet? Did I ever lie about everything I did? (answer to that is yea) Did I back talk and wrestle and scream and yell? Probably. But really my questions are...how do I deal with it? How do I teach my kids that such behavior is not nice? and the golden question would be...HOW DO I DO IT WITH OUT LOSING MY PATIENCE AND RAISING MY VOICE? I know for the most part my kids are good, at least when they are around others, and I know as I parent I probably expect too much from an almost 5 and 3 year old boy. However even if my expectations are high, they should not lie or yell or back talk. My mother tells me its normal and to brace myself because it will get worse.
Jaydon and I are one in the same which makes it twice as hard, because we not only hold each other up to high expectations, but we hold ourselves there too. I am trying to get back to reality and now that a 5 year old probably cant sit for 2 hours listening to his mom read Harry Potter (or really want to) and Jaydon need to learn that I have only been a mom for 5 years, I still have a lot to learn and unfortunately he has to teach me...for him he wants to be the perfect son (and I want him to be too, but I know no one is perfect) and I want to be the perfect mom. Its hard, when you want a clean house, good dinner cooked, smart kids, clean kids, exercise, do a craft, be healthy, no TV, hang out with good friend, find time for myself, find time alone with my husband...but truthfully I am lucky if I can get half of that in a day. The truth is I need to accept that I cant be perfect and neither can my kids. I need to except that my life is good the way it is, I have a comfortable home (which is clean 90% of the time) my kids are smart, they are healthy, and they are relatively good.
Even though I get frustrated or run down, I need to learn to put my expectation in check and not take it out on my kids. I do expect a lot, but maybe its making my kids regress. I would much rather them be happy and healthy then worry about me being upset all the time.
Moving hasn't been easy and I do believe it has effected all of us, We are trying to get settled and meet people, but its hard. Jaydon and Bryce are having a hard time adjusting and Miss their grandparents too much. I am missing my family and friend too much and instead of sitting around missing them, we need to be out meeting people and enjoying one another. We will get there and when we do hopefully we will be stronger and closer then ever. (but we probably wont be perfect ;) )
